If you have been following me on this journey of my WEEKWITHOUT fundraiser for CAP Canada I wanted to apologize for missing yesterdays blog post, and this is my last one as my WEEKWITHOUT will end tomorrow morning!
I am both relieved and nervous about going back to "normal" which is a very loose term in our house, we are not exactly a nice normal family by any stretch of the imagination but you know what I mean, p.s so glad there is nothing "normal" about us other wise I wouldn't fit in. I am excited to see and talk to my family again, yes to all of you who think its a dream to be isolated from the people in your house for a week I challenge you to try it as it will give you a new perspective on the people you live with and do family with, they really aren't so bad in fact I have come to discover that my family are pretty amazing people who can handle a lot without me, wait that's not great. I guess that means I can stop trying to tell everyone what to do all the time because my way is best. As it turns out they can handle life without me after all, who knew. All kidding aside I love them even more than I thought and I think I should probably tell them that more often, louder and with more affection than I usually do. My people are really great people and best of all they are mine. I truly have a new appreciation for loneliness even with the small amount of time I had it. God don't let this experience keep me the same, let it make a change in me and the way I walk in this world.
Choosing times of retreat and reflection are good things sometimes and especially if your intention is to be closer to God and I wish I had made more of this time to do that. I wanted to be able to blog to you about all the GOD TIME I had and I did have some but not in the superhero Christian lady way I thought I might, the truth is I spent a few days complaining, being frustrated, sad, lonely and miserable but yesterday I found myself in the middle of a Holy Spirit awakening . I seemed to come out of the days of frustration and into a day where I just let loose with God almost challenging Him to "show up" like some weirdo who doesn't realize He is here always, the space must finally be getting to me, but seriously I felt His spirit so tangibly yesterday and it gave me renewed energy and opened my eyes to a clarity to see a day that unfolded into this day of miracles upon miracles and watching him weave himself in the lives of people in that incredible way God does and it was breathtaking. I was even too tired to blog about it. I will take Holy spirit exhaustion any day! God don't let this experience keep me the same, let it make a change in me and the way I walk in this world.
I went to work today for a half day on my day off, I didn't want to be home so it made sense to go and work somewhere where people are that I can be a part of something, with this isolation at home I felt myself longing to be apart of something, a group a team and I became more grateful for places missions and ministry spaces where people can just "BE" for a few hours. Be apart of the energy, noise, laughter have someone smile at them possibly join a conversation. Coffee shops make money off of our need to belong, that's why we go there to work on stuff . We are pretending to go there to work alone but cant stand the idea of truly being lonely. God don't let this experience keep me the same, let it make a change in me and the way I walk in this world.
God let me see the beauty of the words in a conversation with someone. Let me embrace the blessings you have given me. Let me learn to love the noise of my not so normal family. Let me see how much stuff I truly have and shut my mouth the minute I dare complain of lack. God help me to draw even closer to you to unwrap all the amazing reasons you have created all of us for love, compassion and community......Forgive me for not believing your Word and needing a WEEKWITHOUT to have this revelation. Thank-you for how awesome you are to a mess like me.
There are still a few hours to go and donate to CAP Canada #Weekwithout. GO to www.capcanada.org/donate and when you go back out into the world tomorrow please don't do it the same way. Generously give your smile, your laughter and your dreams to those who sit alone.
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